An Ineritance for Who? Part 2

An Inheritance for who?  Part 2

A good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children …

Proverbs 13: 22a

The issue of inheritance is big in Nigeria and I guess its the same in some other parts of Africa as a whole. More often than not when a man dies the issue of who inherits his property or whatever he has left creates tension and feuds between families and in-laws. So big is this issue that many times innocent widows are accused of killing their husbands and are subjected to all kinds of dehumanising rituals and practices to prove their innocence or confirm their guilt. Top of the list is to have widows drink the water the corpse is washed with and if nothing happens to her then she is innocent. For God sake! Common sense should let us know that if the man died of a communicable disease chances are that she can get infected and fall sick or die and then she is accused of murder, really Niaja! In times of diseases like Ebola…hmnn, even if he wasn’t sick drinking water used in washing a corpse is not exactly hygienic and could cause health problems.  

In my opinion the main reason is to give some greedy in laws a reason to disinherit her and take everything. This practice is further entrenched by the fact that we live in a patriarchal society where customs and traditions do not allow women to inherit or own land and property. This leads to widows being forced out of their homes especially if they have no children. Other times the children are taken away from the mother under the guise that they will be taken care of and to paint a picture that the relations care but often times these children are used as domestic servants in the homes of such relatives. Sometimes the money their father left is used to care for the relatives and their families while the children are left tattered, unkempt and removed from good private schools and put in public schools. In spite of the reoccurrence of cases where brothers whether legally named next of kin /administrators or not, take everything leaving the immediate family high and dry many Nigerian men still persists in naming their brother as next of kin or don’t put any measures in place to protect their spouse and children. Some family members with the connivance of some members of the society ensure they take everything. The nagging question remains why?

When I think of the emotional trauma I experienced after losing my husband and what I still experience, I can only imagine the heart ache and suffering widows who face these things go through. I ask myself for how long should widows in Nigeria, Africa and possibly other parts of the world keep quiet in the face of perceptions, practices and traditions that infringe on their rights as human beings and steal their pride, dignity and value?  Thankfully I married a good man who had a sense of responsibility and loved us enough to put our welfare first.

Today I celebrate you Tunbosun my husband!  I also hail my in laws who have proved to be genuine Christians and have not bothered us.  Since my husband died I have been the sole provider for my children. Suddenly I am responsible for their education, feeding, upkeep and everything that pertains to life and godliness. I am (under God) their mother, father, family head, leader, teacher, mentor, spiritual leader, bank, ATM, counsellor etc. and yet someone thinks I am not entitled to what their father left to make the burden lighter.