The 31st March, 2012 changed my life forever, it is a day that is etched in my memory for life. A simple phone call that day changed my life completely. Today three long and yet short years have gone by without my dear husband Olatunbosun S. Oyelade. It has definately not been an easy ride but Like I always say God has been so faithful. There is a song that says 'The God of the mountain is still God in the valley..' In the over forty years of my life I have had quite a number of mountain top experiences as well as a fair deal of valley experiences topping the list of course is losing my husband.
Today's post is a special thank you to the Risen Christ for how far He has brought me and my children in the last three years. It is also a tribute to my husband and the life he lived. As I remember the events of that day 3 years ago my heart aches but at the same time I am full of gratitude to the Lord, grateful for the amazing ways He has blessed, kept and provided for my four children and I. A few years back I read a book by Myles Munroe and in it he mentioned the issue of dying empty. According to him God sends each of us into the world with gifts,talents and abilities He expects us to to use for the benefit of mankind so that at the time of our death we would have off loaded everything we have and die empty leaving the world a better place. This must have informed one of his popular phrases i.e. 'the graveyard is the richest place on earth' as a result of unfulfilled dreams and assignments the cemetery contains great doctors, engineers,economists, preachers etc that never were.
Nobody wants to live and die without achieving anything. Everyone wants to live a fulfilled life, a 'full' life if you may. Many times I think of my own life and over and over again I ask God to help me live well and die empty. In the last few days I have thought over my husband's life and the fact that he died at the young age of 48 on the other hand looking back I can say he lived a full life the major reason being that he lived for Jesus. I will share some of the things he did that I believe made him live a happy, fulfilled albeit 'short' life. On the day it would have been his 49th birthday the children and I sat together to talk of him and one thing that was clear was the fact that he was the most jovial person in our home. He joked a lot, told a lot of stories and laughed a lot. He simply added joy and happiness to our lives. Generally he was a happy person who didn't get discouraged easily. He had his fair share of challenges and reasons to be discouraged but like David he would often encourage himself in the Lord. He was also a very positive person always focussing on the good and best instead of the bad and negative. There were times he faced rejection, betrayal and all sorts after talking it over I would sometimes be overwhelmed by the situation and not have much to say or do to encourage him or proffer a solution besides praying for him. He however would spend time reading his Bible to draw strength, spend time in prayer and other times just go to bed early and by the next morning he would be up and ready to face another day having put any unpleasant event behind him.
Another quality in him was his love and concern for people. He often went out of his way to help solve other peoples challenges, spend time talking over issues, visit them and assist in anyway he could. When he was a Sunday school teacher he would look out for people in his class who would make good teachers and encourage them to join the teaching team. So it was with other Church units if he noticed a gifting in a person in a particular area he would encourage them to sign up as workers and use their gifts in the Lord's service. This is something he did before ever becoming a minister or pastor he just loved to see people doing well. When he would go out of his way to visit, encourage and reach out to people as a pastor some people thought he was only doing it to make the church grow. I recall someone telling him ' you don't have to go after the people just pray after all it's God that adds to the Church', really! This person did not realize he was just being himself. It was the same thing when it came to careers, businesses and other issues he often had such good counsel for people to help them in their carers or businesses or help them start one. I met him sometime in December 1991 at Church. I was a first timer in the church and after service he met me outside introduced himself and asked my name and details that's how we became friends. I later got to know that he made it a point of duty to reach out to newcomers in church and befriend them. He used to say it's so easy for people to get lost in church they would come unnoticed and leave unnoticed with their problems intact. So in his own little way he did something.
My husband loved evangelism and missions. There were people he followed, witnessed to and encouraged to be part of a Bile believing Church or members of the Full Gospel Business Men's Fellowship. He used to get so excited about winning souls I remember one time after ministering to someone he said he felt so happy like he had just eaten a nice plate of salad. Any opportunity to support missions was welcome by him. In our early years in marriage the Lord had led me support missions, I had some extra cash and was contemplating whether to send it to a missionary or buy a new shoe. When I asked his advice without a second thought he said' for you it's just another shoe but for the missionary it could mean something much more important. That has influenced my response to other peoples needs many times since then.
I have shared all this in remembrance of him but more as an encouragement. No matter what life has thrown at you choose to remain positive as you trust God for a better tomorrow. Love they say makes the world go round and if there is one thing God desires to see in us expressed towards others it is love. There is something about showing love and being concerned for others that adds value and gives joy. I believe it is one of the greatest secrets of living full and dying empty. There is a hurting world out there. Forget the cover up of clothes, houses, cars and other material things or accomplishments many people are looking for who will just love them. It could be something as simple as a smile, a hug, a prayer, a word of encouragement, a gift , spending time with someone, opening your home to someone the list is endless and the effects can be amazing. The fact that you have experienced hurt and grief means you understand and can be used of God to comfort others. I read something that said 'when you are born you cry and others laugh (rejoice) so you should live in such a way that when you die you will laugh and others will cry. I thank God for my husband because I can say it's not how long but how well. I know he lived a full life. He wasn't perfect (who is) but he did his best to live to the glory of God. Remember success in life is not measured by our material wealth or possessions or even what men think of us. Its about doing what God put you here to do. I invite you to step out in faith and love to the adventure of life God has in store for you so go ahead and live full!
