Monday 28 July 2014

Pressed like Myrrh but not destroyed



2 Corinthians 4:7-9 (NKJV)
But we have this treasure in earthen vessels,that the excellence of the power may be of God and not of us. We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed.

When Jesus was born one of the gifts He received was myrrh along with gold and frankincense which were considered luxurious products used by the rich and noble. Myrrh is got from an ordinary tree that has thorns. The Tree is bleed to get out the myrrh which has so many amazing properties. These include healing and anti oxidant properties. It is also used to embalm the dead, used as incense and was used in Bible times to anoint those called out for service.

One of the major properties of myrrh is its rich aroma and beautiful fragrance. It is therefore used for perfumes while the aroma soothes in times of suffering and pain helping in uplifting a person. Incidentally the word myrrh is derived from an Arabic word that means bitter and it is actually bitter to taste. Myrrh is crushed or pressed before it exudes the fragrance in it.  Something so valuable and useful can therefore come out from something plain, simple and unassuming like the tree or shrub myrrh is taken from. Many of us don’t consider ourselves as special, just regular everyday people then loss or widowhood further dents our self image and esteem. We wonder can any good come out of me. Verse 7 of our text says we have this treasure in earthen vessels. Beloved child of the most High God there is treasure in you.

Like Paul you may have been crushed, pressed, perplexed, and struck down by loss and the challenges of life but you will not be destroyed instead like myrrh God will use the pressure to bring out the treasure in you. The excellence of the power is not ours but it is of God that is why good can come out of what seems to be bad. A look at the lives of heroes of faith in the bible and even some great people that have walked this planet reveals that God allowed them go through life altering challenges but as they yielded to God’s plan for their lives good always came. Sometimes God allows the crushing so he can extract the fragrance from us. The Bible says we are the salt of the earth and just as salt gives flavour and taste God expects our lives to add a beautiful taste and fragrance to the world. I encourage you today to allow God bring purpose out of your pain. and may He cause grace and hope to flow out of your life. This experience will not break you it will make you!

Wednesday 23 July 2014

Why 2 - Go Ahead and Ask!


James 1:5 (NLT)
If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking.

In many Nigerian customs the fear of elders is the beginning of wisdom this includes parents, leaders and anyone older than you. You are not to question their authority. Even when an elder is wrong you must not mention it. So an elder is high up there, can do no wrong and is sometimes feared. Unfortunately many Christians see God in the same way the logic is if you fear and reverence men how much more the Almighty God.

I smile as I remember a group of women from a particular church that visited me when I lost my husband. I was sharing how a book that had been given to me by one of my pastors had helped me. When I mentioned the title of the book –‘When God doesn’t make Sense’ by James Dobson the pastor’s wife almost jumped out of her skin the focus of our conversation changed and they left soon after. Not that I minded because some of them had that ‘danger! Widow, run for your life it might be contagious’ look. Their reaction to the title of the book is just the same with the issue of asking questions. They must have thought how dare anyone even think of God not making sense? What they didn’t realise is that it is more about us not making sense of what God is doing.

Some people fear God might get angry if He is questioned. Others think its disrespectful, some think we might embarrass or discredit God, what if he can’t or doesn’t answer, while others feel as His children we should trust Him in all things knowing He cares and holds our past, present and future securely in His hands. While the last school of thought appears to be the right thing not all Christians are able to go through loss without wondering why at some point even when they know God is in control.

I believe people’s admonitions not to ask is driven by their own fears and insecurities due to misconceptions about fatherhood. Unfortunately this leads to grieving people harboring unspoken questions, fears and uncertainties. They become confused and with time may be resentful towards God because he has allowed this loss and yet refuse them to express their hurts and confusion to him. Asking in this case is not about being disrespectful or rude to God it’s about expressing your hurt and lack of understanding to the one that cares more than anyone else. Asking is therapeutic because it allows you pour out your heart to the father. Bottling up only adds to your pain.

Romans 8:15 says; So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead you received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him ‘Abba, Father’. (NLT). Come on dare to call him Father! Like a child run up and cuddle up near Him and pour out your heart to Him. It frees you from doubts and uncertainties and gives you a sense of peace and release. Cry if you want to but let it out, He is waiting.

Our text says ‘ask…he will not rebuke you for asking? You will be moving forward in your grief. Remember you must trust him enough to leave the answers in his hands because he will answer in the way he deems fit but in your best interest. It may be by giving you some explanation, speaking through his word, others or experiences or simply giving his peace, hope or assurance that all things will work together for good. While I am not guaranteeing you will get an answer or the answer you want, I can guarantee that it will do you good especially if you are the question asking type like me. He will reach you were your at and help you.

Some of the questions you need answers to are the How’s of life after death, how do I cope alone, raise my children alone or pay my bills etc again the Lord says through James 'ask your generous God and he will give it to you' – the wisdom and direction you need to carry on.

Monday 14 July 2014

Why? 1


Matthew 27:46 (NIV)
About three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eli, Eli, lema sabachthani?”(which means “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”)

The quest for answers is in-born in man, from the time a person gets to an age where they can reason they begin to ask questions like Why is the sky blue? Where do babies come from?And they will continue to ask questions till they die. There seems to be an insatiable desire to know the whys, ‘hows’, and ‘whats ’of life in the heart of man. The desire for knowledge and answers increases with age and I believe it was put in us by God. This desire is fundamentalto education and the socio cultural development of individuals, communities and nations. Parents begin to instil their values, culture and beliefs in their children from an early age as they provide answers about life, faith and God. When the child gets to school it is a continuation of finding answers.


While parents and education provide answers to many of life’s questions, we all know that a time comes when we have questions no one seems to be able to answer or which seem not to have answers. As a child I saw my mom as super woman she seemed to be in control of things and always knew what to do but as I grew I realised she was human like anyone else and therefore limited. The fact that people are limited in providing answers is more pronounced in times of loss and griefSomehow no one has an answer to soothe our achinghearts; no one can tell us why our spouses, parents, children or other loved ones died. No one can tell us why it is us and not the next person. So such periods can be extremely difficult because we have questions racing through our minds with no answers.
When I lost my precious husband a number of people said things like ‘do not question God, Who are we mere men to question God, this is not the time for questions. This may be true to an extent especially when my questions didn’t seem to be getting any answers. Howeverbefore I could process whether questioning God was right or not I would have asked so many questions in my heart.

Why? Is a natural response to pain and loss. Jesus was in agony as He hung on the cross in shame bearing the punishment for sins He didn’t commit and in the instant when God for the first time turned away from him the only natural response from his wounded body  grieving heart was My God, My God Why……?

This was Jesus fully God and fully man how much more you and iThe Bible says that His ways and thoughts are far from ours. They are higher and bigger but at the same time we are reminded that his plans for us are not evil but good to give us a future and a hope! Beloved if the questions come go ahead and ask, He is your father. But more importantly trust him even when you don’t have all the answers because he loves you deeply and is committed to your good.

Prayer
Lord Jesus I commit your precious child into your able hands. I ask that she find peace from being able to come before you with her questions and confusion. Help her to see beyond the pain to your love and goodness. Help her to trust you even when she doesn’t seem to have all the answers.

Wednesday 2 July 2014

Who Am I ?



Genesis 1:27-28   (NKJV)
27 So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. 28 Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.”

I walked into the almost empty church and looked round for a seat. Knowing there would be senior pastors at the meeting I was careful about where to sit so I wouldn’t be asked to get up. As people arrived, the pastor presiding over the meeting took the microphone and announced for the different categories of pastors that were not in their allotted sitting areas to move there with their spouses. As some of the people around me got up to move, my mind began to wonder, if my husband where alive he would be here and I would be one of the spouses moving with her pastor husband. However, even though I am an ordained minister the fact that my husband is no more here excludes me from that group. The question I had asked countless times popped up. Who are you Halima? Does being an unmarried woman make you less than the married you? Time and again I have found myself in situations where I feel different from whom I was before losing my darling husband. Before he went to be with the Lord I was a pastor’s wife with oversight functions over the Teens/ Children’s Church and the Women Fellowship along with other responsibilities which I loved doing. Contrary to most women who struggled with their husband’s being pastors I never minded being a pastor’s wife. I loved the Lord and loved serving Him alongside my husband.

This and many such situations are painful reminders of life before and life after loss. From day one of being widowed I hated the word widow and the fact that I am now one. More so that there seems to be no place in society or even the church for a widow, we have singles and youth fellowships, men fellowships, women fellowships that tend to primarily meet the needs of married women but hardly any widow’s fellowships. So a widow just doesn’t seem to fit into any of the groups. Even certain social events are better suited for couples. So you are not married and not single, many times I am in a dilemma not knowing where I fit. I have realised that many married women loose a bit of their identity as distinct human beings by hiding under the shadow of who their husbands are. So when the man dies one thing they struggle with is their identity vis-à-vis their new status in life. The loss of a spouse can leave you feeling like half a human being especially because you did things together, went to places together or he held certain positions that gave you some responsibilities. You don’t only loose the man but also who you where and any position you occupied because you were his wife.

My Bible tells me God created them male and female in His image and He blessed them and told them (that is the two of them and not the man alone) to be fruitful, multiply, replenish and subdue the earth and have dominion. That is who you are! While the fact remains that you have lost some positions or privileges you had as a married woman, do not forget you are a distinct special human being made in God’s image and commanded to be fruitful and multiply. So beyond weeping over the past and what you have lost, look up and ahead to your future with hope! Many women have done excellently well in life including widows and you can be like them. Aimee Semple McPherson is a great example, she was widowed and had all sorts of challenges in life but it didn’t keep her from being who God called her to be and establishing the Foursquare Gospel Church. Her destiny and vision didn’t die with her husband neither should yours. You are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus, bought by the blood of the Lamb, called for a specific purpose and highly favoured! You are special and have an enviable destiny! I encourage you to pursue the dream God put in your heart and be who He called you to be!